Written by: Hurmat Majid
Posted on: August 24, 2022 | 
| 中文
Danish Taimoor as Shamsher and Dur-e-fishan Saleem as Mehak in Kaisi Teri Khudgharzi
In 2022, it should be downright criminal to make dramas like Kaisi Teri Khudgharzi. Harsh as the criticism might sound, seeing the current social climate of the country, one cannot help but be enraged as the drama shows a toxic and abusive man taking the road to redemption after he forcibly marries a girl. While it might be an oversimplification that dramas like these perpetuate violence against women, one needs to understand that romanticizing an abuser to the point that the person abused also “falls in love” with him, means spreading the idea that his actions were justified in the end.
Danish Taimoor and Dur-e-fishan Saleem in the drama
To briefly sum up the story, it starts when Shamsher (Danish Taimoor), a rich powerful brat sets eyes on Mehak (Durr-e-Fishan) during an altercation with her father, played by Shahood Alvi. Just one look at Mehak, and Shamsher decides he loves her and must possess her.
He then tries to convince Mehak that she should marry him by promising her that he would help her get her father out of jail, whom he had himself trapped in a fake case. He forces her to break her engagement, and with that end in mind, abducts the groom. Later on, Mehak moves to a different city and is presumed dead, for the woman had to fake her own death to get away from this man. He somehow finds her, and again forces her to marry him. However, this time, seeing how powerful he is, she agrees and is married off to him.
Mehak's (Dur-e-fishan Saleem) family after her abduction
Now Shamsher, who literally hounded this woman to marry him, is shown to suddenly have so much restraint and “honor” that he refuses to touch this woman without her consent. Bizarre as this may sound, this is the way the producers and writers of the drama have decided to justify Shamsher’s actions, to make audiences believe that all of Shamsher’s obsession with Mehak stemmed from his undying love for her, and once he had the woman he loved by his side, he turned into this gentle loving soul who would bring no harm to her, or more importantly, to her “honor”.
(L to R) Laiba Khan as Nida, Dur-e-fishan Saleem as Mehak, Shahood Alvi as Akram and Laila Wasti as Naheed
The drama has massive following as it is garnering the highest Television Rating Points (TRP) and nearly every episode trends on YouTobe. To see the comments below the episode is not only disturbing but also disgusting. Young girls are fantasizing about Shamsher and a rich man going to similar lengths “for their love”. There are young men agreeing with Shamsher’s actions and saying that they would have done something similar if given the choice. This shows how dramas like these justify criminal acts to a gullible audiences.
The production quality and performances are living up to the expectations. Danish Taimoor has done a decent job as a turbulent rich brat, while Durr-e-Fishan Saleem, with her performance in this serial, has left no excuse for us to not include her in the list of premier young television actors. Veteran Eauman Ejaz as Nawabzada Jamal, has once again impressed with his faultless performance, while Atiqa Odho’s portrayal of Shamsheer’s mother was spot on. Overall, one can’t blame the performances or the production quality for this horrendous show, but its storyline is problematic and controversial.
(R to L) Tipu Sharif as Dara, Atiqa Odho as Shamsheer's mother, Danish Taimoor as Shamsher, Nauman Ejaz as Nawabzada Jamal and Ayesha Toor as Farwa
About a week ago, there was news about a rich and powerful man from Faisalabad, who asked for his daughter’s friend’s hand in marriage for himself, and upon her refusal, abducted and tortured the young girl. Later on, the man was arrested with his accomplices, but was given bail for a nominal sum. It is another example of how women in our society are not safe from their abusers, with even the law unable to protect them. When the news broke out, while there was general outrage on social media, some were still blaming the victim.
Such drama serials only strengthen the misogynistic tendencies in our society, justifying men’s evil acts by romanticizing them. So, while violence against women has always existed in society regardless of what our dramas show, justification for this violence through these dramas is very troubling.
Danish Taimoor, Shahood Alvi and Laila Wasti in one scene
While Pakistan Electronic Media Regulation Authority (PEMRA), was quick to bring out a notification against men and women having conversations while sitting in bed, it has remained silent on dramas showing violence against women. That said, even if PEMRA has not come into action, ARY and its screenplay writers, producers and directors should show more of a sense of responsibility, but their only motivation seems to be their ratings. The time has come for either PEMRA to rethink its strategy, or for the drama producers to decide that glorifying and romanticizing abusive men on television is completely unacceptable.
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